I dun wanna make films for the sake of entering film fest or to be well known in the industry, to win awards and boast about when in crowds.

i just wanna make films, and drown in them, escape in the world of perfectly flawed charactors, in a controlled dream like enviroment, being about to just soak in the same yet different kind of reality. obsession over the fiction which can be molded, unlike the world where we lived in of rules of fate and desinty, where every thing is not in ur control, the butterfly effect, the chain reaction. But in film! imagine being able to control the way one react to another, the perfection of that response etc..

it's like being god.

I had the most interesting nap today. I guess it's what I would call a 'controlling dreams'' situation. It's like being awake and yet dreaming at the same time. Because of being awake, I understood that I was dreaming and hence being able to actually decide what and how to do whatever I wanted in the dream!

Dreams are like living reality. It's not as flat as daydreaming or imagining how things are like. It's like being in another 'real world', another dimension even. events unfolding so real, it's like if u pinch urself, u WILL feel pain. And the kicker part is that u can DECIDE wat happen and how.

Awesome.